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What Netflix’s Adolescence Reveals About Kids’ Struggles and How Parents Can Help

Updated: Aug 1

Spoiler Alert: This post contains details about Netflix’s Adolescence. If you haven’t watched yet and want to avoid spoilers, you may want to come back later.


Netflix’s new limited series Adolescence has sparked widespread conversation about the dangers of social media, cyberbullying, and the radicalization of young boys in toxic online spaces. Many parents watch the show through the lens of fear. They worry about what their kids are exposed to and the influence of the digital world on their lives.


The Challenge of Digital Oversight


The digitization of our culture is accelerating at an unprecedented pace. Many parents hope to manage or limit their children's access to social media and online spaces. However, this task is becoming increasingly difficult. Technology deeply influences education, friendships, and entertainment, making it nearly impossible to completely shield kids. Instead of focusing solely on restrictions, we must shift toward awareness. Understanding how these influences shape our children helps us recognize when they may be struggling.


The Unsettling Truth in Adolescence


Adolescence stood out to me differently. While the series highlights the dangers of toxic online spaces, what struck me most was the chilling interaction between Jamie, the 13-year-old protagonist, and the child psychologist. His aggression, emotional detachment, and inability to express vulnerability pointed to deep psychological distress. This distress seemed to pass unnoticed by the adults in his life. This raises a critical question: Beyond worrying about our children's online content, how can we become more attuned to their internal experiences?


When So Much Feels Out of Our Control, Where Can We Focus?


It’s understandable that parents feel overwhelmed by the forces shaping their children’s lives. The landscape of social media algorithms, peer culture, and constant online messaging can feel impossible to navigate. Nevertheless, we can focus on one crucial aspect: our children’s emotional well-being. We should pay attention to their behaviors, interactions, and occasional reclusion at home.


Jamie’s story in Adolescence makes clear how his exposure to toxic content and bullying significantly influenced his actions. Equally important is that there were likely warning signs of emotional distress that were overlooked. Although we can’t control every message our children encounter, we should recognize when they’re struggling. By creating space for them to process their challenges in a healthy way, we can help.


Signs to Watch: Shifting Focus from Fear to Awareness


Instead of just focusing on online threats, we should consider the emotional challenges our children face. Here are some signs that may indicate a child is struggling emotionally:


  • Extreme emotional reactions - frequent anger, frustration, or withdrawal.

  • Changes in social behavior - isolating from friends or losing interest in activities they once enjoyed.

  • Difficulty expressing emotions - lashing out or completely shutting down.

  • Aggression or cruelty toward others - bullying, manipulation, or a lack of empathy.

  • Obsessive or rigid thinking - preoccupation with specific ideas, rules, or groups.

  • Resistance to authority - hostility toward teachers, therapists, or parents.


These signs don’t always mean a child is in danger, but they indicate a need for more support. Recognizing these patterns allows parents to step in—not with fear, but with curiosity, connection, and care.


How to Open Up Conversations with Your Child


One of the most powerful ways to support our kids is by creating an environment where they feel safe to share their feelings. Starting these conversations isn’t always easy. Here are some open-ended questions that can help foster honest discussions:


  • “It seems like kids today have a lot to navigate between social media, school, and friendships. What feels hardest for you lately?”

  • “I know being online can bring a mix of good and bad experiences. Have you ever seen or heard something that made you uncomfortable?”

  • “Sometimes, it’s easy to feel like we have to handle everything on our own. Who do you usually go to when you’re struggling with something?”

  • “I’ve been thinking about how much pressure kids face to fit in or be a certain way. Do you feel that pressure too?”

  • “I want you to know that no matter what, I’m here to listen. Is there anything on your mind that you haven’t shared with me before?”


These questions aren’t about prying; they give kids permission to share without fear of judgment. Even if they don’t open up right away, knowing that you’re available makes a difference.


Small Actions That Can Make a Big Difference


If there’s one takeaway from Adolescence, it’s that awareness is power. While we can’t eliminate every risk our kids face, we can take small, meaningful steps to help them navigate challenges more healthily:


  • Maintain open-ended conversations - create an environment for emotional exploration without judgment.

  • Observe shifts in behavior - assess changes not just online but in their everyday interactions.

  • Model emotional regulation - demonstrate that discussing feelings is normal and beneficial.

  • Build trust and emotional safety - ensure kids feel comfortable approaching you with struggles.

  • Seek professional help when necessary - early intervention can make a significant difference.


Final Thoughts


It’s natural to feel anxious about what kids encounter online. Instead of feeling powerless, we can shift our focus to what we can control, such as tuning into our kids’ emotional well-being. By recognizing signs of struggle and creating supportive environments, we can help them navigate their challenges effectively.


While we can’t control every aspect of their lives, awareness and connection go a long way. These principles shape how our kids process the world around them. In the end, being present and supportive during their adolescence is one of the most powerful things we can do.

 
 
 

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